Denis Leary, No Cure for Cancer

I have had some really funky dreams as of late, but you can all be thankfull that thus far I have successfully blocked out the majority of the dreams.

Some shit about motorcycles parked in my kitchen, Gloria Estaban handing out rolls of free condoms, stopping world destruction by slapping a button every five minutes *alarm clock real life invading my dreams, man I hate that, always takes the dream to a new, strange level. And yes I know, how can something so strange get anymore strange... trust me, it can* , and driving my brand new spanking yugo while throngs of screaming fans ask me about my beer bottle collection....

its all piece mail at this time, so it makes even less sense then it normaly does.

So, I have got me a plan on finally seeing Jay and Silent Bob Strikes Back before it hits video tape. I have an important meeting I have to go to in Grand Rapids late in this month. I've talked to a friend about getting him to give me a ride there, because its so important. When the opointment is over, I'm going to casually mention, as if the thought JUST accord to me, since where in a larger town, lets go see if we can watch a movie....

I'm going to ambush him with this.....a little guerilla warfare tactics to achieve my goal. I aint above trying this.....so stop frowning at me like that.

So now I'm a proud owner of Skinemax, the channel for when you want to get your jollies off, but can't quite handle watching the real thing. Nothing like a little soft core porn to make a man wonder.......where the fuck is that guy hiding his penis, and how come that chic is ridding his stomach as if he just swallowed a carton of mexican jumping beens?? They probably tap the guys shclong to his leg.......which is just a thought process I REALLY didn't need to go into...

escuse me.....I'm going to go hurl my pizza rolls

So after weeks of no guestbook entries *which I was starting to think was broken, but since its nothing but strings of data, I couldn't do my usual "pic it up and shake the shit out of it" to see if I can get it working agian*, I get four of them in a few days span *three in one day*. Two of them declarations of adding me to there favorites list, and a third just adding me to it. Now aint I the popular one right about now, making me feel all woozy and shit with emotions over here.

Miss Throckmorton being the biggest suprise of them all. I'm just getting all kinds of suprises via diaryland lately. Not only is she a woman who holds such an extensive grasp of the English language to make my head spin as I beg for my mommy, a lover of Shakespere AND actually understand it, and enough class that its actually leaking through the pixels of my monitor everytime I read her diary. So naturally I'm thinking "No fucking way a lady like this would read my shit, probably thinks I'm one of the mentally handicapped with teret's syndrom." So imagine my suprise that not ONLY is she reading my shit, she is adding me to her favorites list and...

I really like your style!

Whoa, I have a style??? Where did I get one of those and how much did I pay for it.

Now the guestbook entry that is the most disturbing has got to be some guy named Vincet. Leaving his phone number and asking me to call to make friends and something about fucking and only men.

WHAT THE FUCK!!!! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!!!!

I can only blame myself on this one. I made the big mistake of making a joke about liking to be spanked. Silly me, I was thinking I was imune to this shit. Cause lets face it, making sexual advances on me is sorta like that whole dick squezed in a vice and liking it.

Painfull and hard to understand why.

So Vincent, be rest assured I won't be calling unless I decide to ask what you are on and where can I get some.

Its just my luck, my first sexaul adnvance in my guest book is from some dude from god knows where......

Look up irony in the new edition Websters Dictionary...

See Chrome's life

LATER

It's about time - Wednesday, Jul. 07, 2004
An Honor for Chrome - Friday, Feb. 20, 2004
A great loss - Monday, Oct. 20, 2003
a terrible announcement. - Tuesday, Sept. 09, 2003
Chrome speaks: - Friday, Sept. 05, 2003