Went from snow and constant cold weather a week ago to "oh my god I think I just sweeted my ass off" which is problematic since duct tape doesn't stick to wet surfaces.

Now I know its going to get even hotter with summer quickly aproaching, and I'm fully aware its a hell of a lot hotter down south, but god damn.

Go from constant temperatures under the water freezing level, wind chill making it in the single digits to even negative degrees. Then, the temperature sky rockets to the high eighties, and my ass turns into sweety cookie dough.

I do hate the cold, I hate when its so cold its almost painfull and the only thing you can think of is how sweet it would be in your bed covered in a few dozen blankets and your furnace on so high like its heating hell.

I may hate the cold, but I loath the heat with a seething hatred only reserved for corrupted senators and anchovies on my pizza.

Ok, to be more specific, I don't completely hate the cold. I hate when its to cold, but when its a bit chilly out, thats when I'm most happy. When I can throw a medium thick coat on over some warm clothing, walk around town enjoying the brisk, crisp air. When I climb into bed, under the covers, cold at first tell your body heat warms it up and you just melt into your bed. Oh christ thats a good moment...especially with clean, fresh sheets.

Oh, there is a heaven, and it amazingly smells soapy fresh.

I would a skip a night of hot, freaky sex just to keep from messing up that moment.

HER: Hey baby....you want to tie me up and treat me all nasty tonight?

ME: Hell no, are you crazy! Don't go fucking up my magical moment with my sheets now.

Which reminds me of a little fact I get strange looks from people when I mention it. You see, I love having a fan on when I'm sleeping. It doesn't matter what time of the year it is, or how freakin cold it gets outside. My fan is on the moment I'm ready to climb into my bed.

I need the white noise of the fan going, the feel of a cool breeze blowing over my face. If I don't have this, I don't sleep very well and will wake up often during the night. The thing is, that is not the only reasons I like having a fan on, especially during the winter.

You see, I like to play this little game while I'm laying in bed before I go to sleep. First off, I like to sleep like how I came into this world....naked and covered in blood.

Ok ok.....maybe I'm embelishing a bit there....sometimes I wear shorts to bed.

What I do is I get all my blankets and my bed sheet ready to grab it and with one quick tug, pull it over me. I then leave it lying next to me so I'm completely uncovered in bed, fan blowing cold wind up the length of my body. I then see how long I can last the cold before it gets unbarable, then I'll throw the blankets over me and smother myself in its comforting goodness.

Now I know this may sound strange to a lot of you, but I'll be damned if I can think of anything feeling better then that moment of throwing the blankets over me, blocking out the cold warming me like a soft hand cupping me. In my head I play a little fantasy that I am lost somewhere in the deep wooods, snow covering everything, me freezing in the harsh enviroment, desperate to survive. Then, the blankets cover me, saving me from the impending doom of freezing to death. Its a fantastic feeling, I'm telling you.

And don't look at me like that....I know I can be a tad bit strange.

I also play another little game with my alarm clock by setting it two hours ahead of time. Aparently I like playing pranks even on me at my most vulnerable. To wake up in the night, see that alarm clock and freak out at what time it is, knowing I have to be up very shortly.....oh, but wait....my clock is set two hours ahead of time....I CAN SLEEP ANOTHER TWO FREAKIN HOURS!!!

Which is absolutely fantastic to me since I do love my sleep. I'm a junky for it, can't get enough of it. I love it more then movies and you know very well I'm a movie fanatic.

And I'm saying this now, if Sinnamon's bed is half as fantastic as she says, I swear I'm going to break into her place when she is at college and take a nap in it....fan on, clock set two hours ahead. She wouldn't even have to worry about me spanking it in her bed....I'll be to busy with my freezing to death fantasy and doing math while half asleep.

Somewhere along this entry I started off bitching about how much I hate hot weather and ended up talking about the heavenly goodness of my bed and my weird night time routines.

Which is probably my brain trying to hint to me I need some freakin sleep. Though I think personaly it has an alterior motive for me to go to sleep. I think its just begging for me to fall asleep so it can run through its Shannon Elizabeth buck naked on a pile of cool whip fantasies.

Like I'm going to argue with my brain over that.

It's about time - Wednesday, Jul. 07, 2004
An Honor for Chrome - Friday, Feb. 20, 2004
A great loss - Monday, Oct. 20, 2003
a terrible announcement. - Tuesday, Sept. 09, 2003
Chrome speaks: - Friday, Sept. 05, 2003