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DATE/TIME
Friday, Oct. 26, 2001 - 5:04 A.M.

TITLE
HOLY SHIT, FBI! Quick, hide the bong....hide the bong!

ENTRY

So it seems that the town that hell forgot *the place I live for all of you not keeping up* is not forgotten by everyone. It seems the FBI are swarming this little back woods tourist attraction/industrial town. Aparently there trying to break down hard on all the drug trafficing that happens in and out of here. Of course the majority of this is cracking down on the sales and distribution of mary jane, which is a complete waste of time and money as far as I'm concered. Just fucking legalize it already you bunch of anal retentive assholes.

I really don't want to get into the whole argument of legalizing marijuana, cause then I will just get off my point.

So there are here for that, and it seems a bit more. A friend of mine told me they stopped by his apartment looking for the where abouts of his sister's estranged husband. Seems he is wanted for a few crimes, murder suspicion being number one on the list. I have always thought that this guy and prison where destined to be together for the rest of his life. I personaly thought any time he was out of prison was just him abiding his time tell he gets caught for something again and is sent back. It seems this time if he gets caught, he aint coming back.

All of this reminded me of a story from a few years back when I ran across the FBI.

I used to live in this goverment assested apartment comlex, a haven of white trash partiers and social security abusing drug dealers. There where several one floor buildings spread out with four apartments to each building. There where so many damn kids there, I sweart there was at least ten of them per apartment. And they where some loud annoying fuckers I'll tell you. How you get THAT much noise out of such a small body, I'll never know. I was begging for a school year to start JUST so I could get some sleep late in the morning without hearing millions of children screaming and laughing constantly.

Well I was cleaning up my apartment one night, when I decided to take out a couple bags of garbage and check my mail, kill two birds with one stone. As I'm heading to the parking lot where the garbage bins and mail boxes are, I noticed a couple cop cars parked out front in front of the building I lived in. No big deal since there is problems there every night and the cops are coming around two or three times a night for domestic disturbances and the like. So I keep walking, and thats when I notice more cop cars parked on the either side of the island in the middle of the parking lot. So now I see about six or seven cop cars, and looking a bit more about three more unmarked cop cars.

Ok, so adviously this is about more then a bunch of teenagers getting drunk and turning the stereo up to high or some couple getting in a knock down drag out fight over who at the last box of mac and cheese.I keep walking, but more slowly this time as my interests are peeked and I look around for any signs of activity. As I'm walking back after grabbing my mail, I see a couple people walking down the path way leading to the apartments behind mine in the same building. There all wearing blue wind breakers, and one of them turns around to reveal lo and behold....... FBI written in big, yellow letters.

So I try and play it cool as I walk past, but I think I blew my cover by contstantly looking back to see more and mouthing the words, "HOLY SHIT, THATS THE FBI."

I get back to my apartment and run over to the far wall of my living room since the bust was on the apartment on the other side of that wall. I press my ear to the wall in hopes of hearing something, but to no avail. I did hear a comotion on the other side of the wall earlier, but I had written it off for normal neighbor bullshit. These walls in that apartment complex where so thin you could hear a mouse fart. So thin you could tell what telvision show they where watching just by listening to the dialoug. So thin you could hear the labored breathing of some one whacking it in the bathroom and the crinkle of the spank and tickle monthly clenched in there fists.

You getting my point...REAL FUCKING THIN FOLKS!!

So other then hearing the occasion shift of the corn cobs up the FBI's asses, I don't hear shit. The next day I come to find out it was a bust, seems my next door neighbor was selling the sweet green out of his house in large quantities.

And to think of all the nights that me and several other people have toiled over finding a source to buy from, and here I had it sitting right next to me. Hell I could have had it delivered to my door like a freakin pizza. Call up the guy next to me and place a order, then call up Pizza Hut and see who gets there faster. Of course the safe bet would seem to go for the guy next door to me getting there first, but this guy smoked his own product and I know stoners, I had a better chance of mowing on a slice of pizza first before getting a bag.

Then again he DID get busted from the FBI, so I guess I can count my lucky stars I wasn't a part of it at all.

BUT still........

right next door!!!!!!

Think of all the time I would have saved.

Man, I'm lazy.




Michael Moore for 2004





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