Or as the kids call it, Harry's D.I.C.P.

Oh those wacky kids.

We got sales galore here, you name it, we got here at Harry's.

We got blenders, we got car stereos, we got home theaters, hell we got even your dead grandma's soiled panties.

I'm saying we got it all!

And its all insanely dirt chip....or as I like to say it "I'm gettin a reaming from every costumer".

But don't tell my wife that, she gets jealous.

ho ho ho I'm a jokester, you get that for free here at Harry's Dirt Insanely Cheap Products!

We got prices so low it will make you spank your momma's ass and wonder where she left your faovirte Scooby Do underoos. Its that cheap folks!

And you say Harry...how the hell do you do it buddy? You must be insane Harry, you should be commited!

And I tell you folks, I should be commited for the prices I'm giving away to you!

You say you want a home stereo for less then three hundred dollars. I'll tell you not only will get you the best home stereo for three hundred dollars, but I through in a vietnamese hooker for free!

Now aint that a bargain!

You tell me you want a wide screen television and don't mind that the serial numbers are scratched off. I got JUST the thing for you my friend!

You say you want a diamond ring for your girlfriend and you don't mind a few blood stains. Whoo hoo I got JUST the thing for you too!

You say you need to get rid of a dead body quick, no questions asked. I say park that van out back my friend cause I got JUST what your looking for!

Here at Harry's Dirt Insanely Cheap Products, we ask no questions, we give no answers. All for your convient shopping needs!

You say you've been admiring your next door neighbor's brand new car! Well hell son, I got JUST what you need. Three weeks after the police investigations, not only can we get you that spankin new car, but anything else you desire from there house!

Cause at Harry's we are ccccrrrraaaazzzzzyyyyyyy to make you happy!!

And I know what you are thinking folks, your wondering how your good pal Harry could possibly do all this at such insnae prices.

Brand new DVD player for twenty bucks. Totally insane!

2 GHZ processor computer with burner, scanner, printer, fax, and top line video and audio cards for just $99.99. You've fucking lost it Harry!

A 2002 Cadillac El Derado with a built in television, playstation, and hundred CD changer for around two hundred bucks. Thats it, its time for your medication Harry cause you obviously are crazy!

And you know what folks, you would be amazed how much you can get at such low low prices when your bed with the Triad.

So come on down to Harry's Dirt Insanely Cheap Products and get yourself all you want for less then one pay check!

Just head on down US 41 and look for the giant clucking chicken in front of Jimmie's Chicken Shack and ask for Big Pappa Leg Breaker in the back parking lot!

After a full boy and cavity search and a history back ground, you to can partake in the insnae prices of Harry's!

*Location of Harry's Dirt Insanely Cheap Products subject of change at a moments notice.*

It's about time - Wednesday, Jul. 07, 2004
An Honor for Chrome - Friday, Feb. 20, 2004
A great loss - Monday, Oct. 20, 2003
a terrible announcement. - Tuesday, Sept. 09, 2003
Chrome speaks: - Friday, Sept. 05, 2003