"My brains, his steel, and your strength against sixty men, and you think a little head jiggle will make me happy, hmm."

The Princess Bride

Well, this has been a boring ass weekend again AND I was busy as hell on top of it.

Decided, what the hell, time to finally give this kitchen a once over with the paint brush.

When I moved in this apartment, I wanted to get in as fast as possible, so I forgo the offer of repainting the entire apartment by my land lords, just so I could get in a week early.

So now I am paying for that hasty suggestion, since I have to paint the place myself. Then again, I was living with the most insane couple I have ever had the dishonor of being trapped within the same building for two weeks.

At first, it was great living there with them and a friend of mine who moved in shortly after I did. It was always clean and nice looking, had a huge screen tv and a satelite, she loved to cook so we had these HUGE breakfeasts each and every day with coffee and vitamen pills along with it. The guy was a truck driver, so he had big hand fulls of cash and a pension for smoking at least two joints a day and sharing it with the rest of us.

Cool, so we eat a big breakfeast, smoke a joint and enjoy the warm summer days with relaxing outside, playing video games, playing around with his guitar, a relaxing fun atmoshere. Sure he had a bit of a temper, but nothing weed and a relaxing day wouldn't cure, and sure she was a bit of a fanatical christian, which isn't my thing, but I believe to each his/her own, and believing in a higher power and book on belief structure will get your day moving and your life happier, I say more power to you, just don't try and convert me or tell me my beliefs are wrong.

Well, I severly underestimated her fanaticism and how unbalanced she is. Little did I know she was so lost in her own little world, so tightly clinging on her belief structure with a grip of death, that she was in desperate need of a rainbow of mood altering meds.

After about a week, it became more and more evident to me and my friend, and somewhat frighting how unbalanced she was. She would read the bible constantly, then take what she wanted out of it and twisted it horribly to fit in HOW she wanted her belief structure to be.

I think the head of this beast was revealed one night when we where having long discusion together. After a point, my friend and the husband where in there own conversation, while I was in a conversation with the freaky wife.

So, the conversation leads to religion, which seems to be the ONLY thing she liked talking about.

fine.......I don't have a problem with that......thats if YOU don't mind me having conflicting beliefs then you.

Just to clear things up with you readers on my belief structure. I'm the consement skeptic, I really don't believe in much that doesnt make logical sense to me, and I have a strong belief in this, so I have no problem discusing in great detail with people about this, have a debate with someone who is a believer. I find the conversations to be intersting and enlighting in there own way.......

normally...

With her, well lets just tag an analogy to this one.

A conversation with her about religion is similiar to banging your head into a brick wall repeaditly in order to put in a new door way. The results are the same, you get nowhere but confusion and possible brain damage afterwards, and the pain is comparable I'm telling you.

So I listen to her and interject here and there, but try and stay neutral about it, cause with everyone I know with a strong enough belief in god and the bible, as soon as I go into details about my beliefs, I got them feeling sorry for my soul.

Which I"m telling you, is got to be one of the most annoying things a person can do to me.

"but you are such a good person, how can you not believe in this?"

Because slappy, I have pondered this long and hard for most of my life and this is the conclusions I came up with. I make no delisions or assumptions that I could possibly know the grander scheme of life and the after life if EVEN there is such a thing.

Now I have excepted your believes and your needs for it, why can't you except mine? Doesn't that book teach you something about love thy neighbor and tolerance for your fellow man?

Have I said before how much I DESPISE hypocracy, and how much there is in religion.

So, she keeps asking about my beliefs, trying to pry them out of me. I try and warn her, "Hey, you aint going to like how I believe in things, trust me on this."

Of course, she doesn't trust me, so I give her the lay out of my beliefs.

My beliefs so conflict with hers, that she gets frustrated with me, no matter how calmly and rationally I talk to her, tell she looks at me and says.

"Whoa, I feel sorry for you and your soul *see what I mean* cause its advious you have been raised so wrong."

*record scratch*

WHAT THE FUCK DID SHE JUST SAY TO ME????

So I stare at her completely stunned at the tenacity of this woman, the gull to THINK she can even CLAIM to know how I was raised.........I hold hard to the whelling anger deep inside me and try and to explain to her....

Look, this has NOTHING to do with how I was raised, I came to these conclusions all by myself, I wasn't coherced by anyone to believe in this, nor was I subjected to some where cult or "anti-religion prapoganda". I take full responsibility for my believes and if there is a after life and they can't except me for me rather then in some belief structer here on earth we are left with more questions then answers and a tough time to believe in the answers that have been given, so be it. I will not be bullied or preasured in believing in some belief structure, and I refuse to start believing or praying JUST cause I'm at the worst time of my life or I'm about to die, which to me would be a complete betrayal of everything I have stand for and who I am, for a belief structer is not just for when things are going nice and easy, then abadon them when things look bad and jump on the closest band wagon.

So despite trying to explain this to her, she locks on to the belief I was raised wrong, and tries to explain to me WHY I was raised wrong and WHY I am wrong. I'm getting angrier by the passing second, but I do a real good job keeping it sustained inside me.

Little did I know, the husband and friend can hear our conversation, and both of them so annoyed and angry at her saying this shit, imediately jump into the conversation and try to explain to her what the fuck I'm saying.

But, lost in her little world, she doesn't hear a thing we say, and sticks with how SHE sees it.

Fine.....be that way...*grumble, mumble*

So, from that point on, she proceeds to subject us all with constant comments here and there about religion and "what the bible says" and all this shit, driving us all nuts. The husband, hating how rigid she is about this, to the point she is pushing people away from it rather then embracing them, so pissed off that she can act so high and mighty, but be the BIGGEST hipocrat you could ever see, mad things turn from worse to a episode of cops.

Did I mention they lived in a trailer.......just letting you know to add to the feel of this white trash hell I was in.

So the last few days I'm there, me and my friend try desperately to keep out of every argument they have, going outside to get away, but for some unknown reason, she ALWAYS wanted us not only to hear the arguments, but to witness them too. It was not like he was abusive, sure had a temper, but he only took it out on furniture and the ocasional guitar, and this temper never showed up tell she would go on and on about religion, and not pay attention to a single word you had to say.

So, when I got the phone call telling me it will be another week tell the apartment was ready so they can paint, you bet your sweet bippy I turned that down tute sweet to get the fuck away from those two.

So now, I have spent most of this weekend moving all the furniture and refridgerator around to slap a couple layers of white paint on the walls. Being a clumsy fucker, by time I was done I looked like someone who had a happy "accident" in a cocaine factory, I was so covered in white shit.

*sniff sniff* I didn't mean to do that man.

Now I'm finally done doing that, have everything moved back in place, installed all the new fixtures after the paint drys. Now, I got to let my mother come in and do something special with the walls, make them look a little less like I'm about ready to do surgery in there.

So, she is going to paint a crawling vine that goes all around the kitchen with grapes and leaves coming off it, bought a tapestry to put up on the wall that will match the paint job. Should look preaty god damn good when its all done.......at least that what I'm hoping.

Right now I'm just glad it looks clean in there......I'm simple that way....its clean...good..don't fuck with it cause it means more work for me later.

Well, enough about my boring ass weekend......I got to go shopping tomorow.....

well whoop da freakin do.........I'm so jazed about this I'm about ready to pee myself.

And to top off this week of excitment and thrills, I get to polish every single piece of wood in my house, dust every surface and nick nack, organize my book shelves and set things for storage, and clean my carpets.

I'm telling you, this home improvement shit is getting on my nerves.......DAMN YOU MARTHA FREAKIN STEWART!!!

I'm thinking she is the anti-christ.....working her evil plans one home made cookie at a time.

It's about time - Wednesday, Jul. 07, 2004
An Honor for Chrome - Friday, Feb. 20, 2004
A great loss - Monday, Oct. 20, 2003
a terrible announcement. - Tuesday, Sept. 09, 2003
Chrome speaks: - Friday, Sept. 05, 2003