Just go here

I can wait, go read it.

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HA, you didn't believe me when I said I was one of the new people on diaryland classics now did you! You see, I'm right there under the Ubermeister

Yeah, that will show all you who dare to doubt me....heh

Anyways...

Nothing really special happened today, other then the dread of knowing I will be suffering the grocery shopping blues tomorow. Which I'm preaty sure if my track record stays the same, you'll be a ear load about tomorow.

Well, one thing did happen, I had yet another confirmation I'm a flaming idiot.

Since you actually do read my diary, this would not really need any explaining, but I'm doing it anyways.

Well, I have in my possesion some therapy puddy. I think I ahve made mention of it in a past entry, but I'm not sure if I really did or just dreamed it.

Damn it, I really hate those dreams that later on you have to quiestion if it was a dream or reality.

Even if I did make mention of it in a past entry, I'm just going to pretend I didn't. Life is so much easier when you do that.

So, I have this therapy puddy, which is a lot like silly puddy, but its a lot softer and doesn't seem to grow dry and hard. Coco brought it over one day out of boredom, which was like a month ago, and since then its been the toy of choice by me and a lot of my visitors.

Actually it is great exercise for the hands if you play with it a lot, hence why its called therapy puddy. Meant to help strengthen the lower arms and hands of patients with tenis elbow.

And when I say this shit is soft, I mean its really soft. Its gravity's bitch when not laying flat on a surface. When it isn't, it will very slowly bent, flatten, or twist to reach a flat surface which it will finally pool up in small hump. Watching it do that, it seems like its almost alive, but crawls at a snails pace. With it being a puke colored green, its not hard to imagine it as the Blob. Which has been a source of many hours of fun for me.

AH SHIT!! ITS EATING ME, ITS EATING MMMEEEEEE!!! OH THE HUMANITY!!

Yes, I'm fully aware how weird I am...

After many hours of playing with it, I have come to realize it sticks to all surfaces, but is easily priable off. Well, everything but pants and remote control buttons.

With pants, it doesn't stick to bad, it can be a pain in the ass to get off, but eventually it will all come off. Now remote control buttons, you can't even sand blast that shit off it.

I figured this out when I accidently dropped it on this shitty universal remote control I have been using. You'd be thinking I learned something from this lesson.

AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA

Then, adviously, you don't read this diary.

So, with K-mart going bankrupt, I decided to pick me up a new universal remote for my TV and VCR. I couldn't pass up thrity percent off a good universal.

So I get me this Sony universal remote control to add to the aresnal of products that is my entertainment center.

GE television, Sanyo DVD player, RCA stereo, Panasonic VCR.

And let me tell you, this Sony universal is quite the shiznit. Has the ability to control seven different items. Of course it turns out my stero doesn't have a remote sensor on it, and this universal doesn't have codes for my particular brand DVD player.

So why did I get it when I knew a seven-in-one universal would be to more then I need? Cause its so shinny and high teck looking!

Yeah, you can see how my priorties are.

Pus, it was six bucks off the remote adn there was only three other universals left, all pieces of crap.

So, all the buttons on my other unviersal are covered in a fine layer of this therapy puddy, so you would think I would be a lot more carefull with my shinny new remote.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

Pay attention!

Well, I normally just drop my remote control in my lap when I'm not flipping channels, and per usual it was sitting right there when an urge to play with the puddy came over me.

For some reason, which escapes me now, I have stretched the puddy out and I'm swinging it around. Well, the thinner the puddy gets, the faster it stretches out. Usually, when you are swinging it around like that, it thins out somewhere near your hand, but remains a giant clump at the end of it.

So I swing the puddy a little to hard, which makes it stretch out ultra fast. The end flies up in the air, makes a little arc in the air, then lands squarly in my lap.

I didn't even have to look down to know EXACTLY where it landed.

Cringing, I fianlly look down, and what do you know. There it is, sitting in a little clump right on top of my shinny, brand spankin new remote control, all over the buttons.

SUMABITCH!!!

So, for the next two hours I'm sitting there scrapping off excess therapy puddy off my remote, desperatly trying to get as much off the buttons as possible.

Now, I gotta wait for ever tell the shit dries up and eventually flakes off.

I'm a child.....I'm a flamingly stupid child sometimes.

It's about time - Wednesday, Jul. 07, 2004
An Honor for Chrome - Friday, Feb. 20, 2004
A great loss - Monday, Oct. 20, 2003
a terrible announcement. - Tuesday, Sept. 09, 2003
Chrome speaks: - Friday, Sept. 05, 2003