I bring this up because ever since I became sick I have been sleeping in my recliner. I�ve been over that sickness for about a week now, but still I sleep in my chair. I do this because 1) I�ve grown comfortably used to it and 2) my bedroom is as cold as a meat locker and my chair is less then ten feet away from a heater.

I first started sleeping in my chair because I was sick of getting out of bed every two minutes to go to the bathroom. In my recliner magically I didn�t need to go as often and when I did I was a hell of a lot closer to the bathroom and it was easier to get to.

Now I�ve kept myself parked on my chair because of the cold issue. I do have a little space heater in my bedroom, but I have twelve feet high ceilings. It takes forever to get that room up to tolerable with that little heater. I would turn it on an hour before I go to bed, but I don�t trust that fire hazard alone in my room.

So I�ve stayed in my chair and been waiting until the temperatures outside get decently warm. Ignoring the fact what happened the last time I camped out sleeping in my chair for a week.

This happened about four years ago and I was so sick I literally could not move. I was miserable from my head down to my toes. So I decided to just stay in my chair and only get up out of it when I had to go to the bathroom. I did this for about a week and on that final night I woke in severe pain. Sleeping in that same position for a solid week cramped me up so bad I thought someone dropped a Semi right on top of me. Through all that pain I just managed to crawl out of my chair and into my bed so I could stretch out.

You would think with as much pain as I felt that day. I would have realized maybe I shouldn�t ever do that again.

Um, no, you are giving me way to much credit there.

I figured I was safe this time. It�s a recliner and the old chair I only had a milk crate to put my feet up. So I�m laying down more in my recliner then I was in my old chair. I shouldn�t have any of those cramping problems then, right?

Well yesterday I woke up and realized yes as a matter of fact, dumb ass, you will have that problem. My right side and back are aching pretty badly, but not immobilizing bad. Pretty much I have a stitch in my side that makes me cringe when I bend the wrong way. I figure if I go back to sleeping in my bed the next night I�ll be problem free.

Then around eleven o�clock that night I�m sitting her on my computer, reading some of my favorite diaries. I don�t even think about it when I feel a sneeze come on. My natural reaction is to hold it in so I don�t spray snot everywhere.

Bad idea. Oh what a bad idea that was.

Violent body reaction to the sneeze and this pain in my right side/back flares up like someone just shoved a white hot poker into my side and started twisting it. The pain is so quick and so intense I can�t even take a breath. I�m fighting to either stay conscious or not throw up from the pain, it is that bad.

After what felt like an eternity the pain slowly lessens to a tolerable, can now breath, level. That shit freaked me out how bad it was, I thought for sure I had ruptured something inside me. I know it couldn�t have been a ruptured or herniated disk; it was too far off the spine to be that.

I fight it out awhile longer thinking it will pass, but now every cough and turn to my right brings on a deep, tiring pain. So finally I call it quits and trudge my way off to bed. It turns out this wasn�t the answer I was looking for. No matter how I laid I couldn�t get comfortable, but I couldn�t move around either. Every move I made tugged on the muscles that hurt so bad.

I�m now in so much pain I�m literally whimpering every time I move to much, cough, or sneeze. It gets so bad I�m actually thinking I might need to go the hospital for this.

I�m now at full freak out mode. I can�t remember the last time I had anything happen to me bad enough that made me seriously contemplate going to the hospital.

But I decided to try one last tried and true miracle. The end all be all answer to when life is miserable, I feel like shit, and I need reassurance that I�ll be just fine and in fact I am not dying. Since I don�t have a girlfriend to do this for me so I can be �manly sick�, that means the good ol stand by.

I ask my mommy.

Yep, I�m a grown man and I�m running to my mommy because my side hurts. Just call me King Stud for now on.

Well a tube of Icy Hot and 24 hours of lying on an electric blanket with as little movement as possible. The pain has gone from �I think I punctured my kidney!� to �Good god that stings like a mofo!� With 70% probability that in three days I�ll be at �I�m not so bendy to my right side� kind of pain.

That�s right I was a big ol baby and my mommy came to my rescue.

I feel like such a man today.

It's about time - Wednesday, Jul. 07, 2004
An Honor for Chrome - Friday, Feb. 20, 2004
A great loss - Monday, Oct. 20, 2003
a terrible announcement. - Tuesday, Sept. 09, 2003
Chrome speaks: - Friday, Sept. 05, 2003